Tuesday, October 21, 2014

...And In the End

[REMEMBER: This is from my point of view.]

At first, I was devastated to find out in April 2013 she wanted a divorce.

But after my May 2013 visit with the girls, I knew the love was gone. It was officially over. I know I didn't want this to happen, but it was happening.

After she first told me, I was waking up at 5am with the worst stomach pains I've ever felt. I had to add Tums and Pepto to my diet.

But something happened, after she told me what I didn't want to hear... I realized something... I realized we were making each other miserable. When one is getting home from work and the other is heading to work, and not one word needed to be heard is said..... It's officially over.

So, I had to move on from her, but never from my girls. She would be "there", but never "there" for me or us.

In June to the middle of July, I had a blast spending time with my girls. She picked them up after and they went back home for a couple weeks until they came up for a couple more weeks.

Conversations continued between her and I, and during those conversations that came up one day, I had to reply by saying, "I don't want to be your husband anymore". (I still have screen shots of this).

Yes, I'll admit it, she wanted me back. But I couldn't come back to that life of being miserable, putting on a fake smile, and head back up to Salt Lake again if it didn't go smoothly again.

Have you ever tried to be happy in your life while something terrible was going on and you kept denying to yourself anything bad had/was happening? That's what I was doing to myself. I didn't want to experience that from happening again, as well as other stuff.

But come September 2013, I finally filed for divorce. Over the next year of dealing with a useless lawyer and an mediator who didn't know jack shit, I finally filed the correct paperwork...

As of October 17th, 2014, the judge over our case signed the papers stating with the State of Utah, we were officially divorced.

Ady and Chloe,

I will always be your dad, even as you grow older and things may get busier in your life (especially ages 12-18 during those higher school years).

I will always love you. I still love you. And I will never stop loving you... Even if you get mad at me (one of these days) and say you don't.

You are ALWAYS WELCOME to come visit, stop by, stay, live with me (whatever) anytime you would like, even if it is not in our scheduled time frame for whatever reason it may be. I will be there for you. Why? Because you come first!

Right now, daddy is trying very hard to find a second job so he can live on his own. So if things get busy, know I will do my best to have our time-- even if I have to come down there to visit. But if one of our visits is to happen and it doesn't, I'll do my best to make up for it.

If you ever need to talk, you have my number (on moms phone) and can call me (even if I am at work).

I love you girls. I am so proud to be your father, because everyone I meet has told me I am a good father to you both, and that you are the most sweetest, nicest and kindest girls they have ever met.

(Added 10/28/14) Girls, always remember that your mom and I love you both very much, and we are going to do our best for you. You have many family members and friends who also love you as much!

Ryan Paul Sharich

May 2014 Visit

The girls came up with their mom on the 16th of May so they could go to a friends wedding. Instead of letting them stay at the hotel where she was staying, she let them stay with me. So after being dropped off, they spent the first night watching movies with me. It was the first time they had ever seen Wizard of Oz... Only thing was, it was the RiffTrax version.

The next day, I told them I would order the largest pizza they will probably ever get...

After eating, we went and played at the splash pad until the sun went down.

I had to work the next morning, but while at work, she came and picked up the girls for the wedding and so I went over to hang out with Tasha until I could pick them up after. After I picked them up, I brought them back to my place to spend the last night here.

The next day, I took the girls back to meet their mom at McDonald's by the freeway so they could head home.